i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
