I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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