That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
This baby is an asshole
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?