I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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