Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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