5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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