Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
