nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
