Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize