just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
