I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
