she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I have feelings that need drinking.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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