What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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