It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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