my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Shame is for Republicans.
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