so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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