More tranny stories later!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
