Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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