You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
