Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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