His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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