Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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