Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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