i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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