I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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