Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."

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  (918): i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut." http://tfl.nu/bhgh
  Replies (13) Good night (4422) Bad night (642)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze

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  (305): we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze http://tfl.nu/vupv
  Replies (14) Good night (5544) Bad night (937)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic

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  (317): The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic http://tfl.nu/lvdi
  Replies (17) Good night (15959) Bad night (1248)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?

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  (239): Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning? http://tfl.nu/tqik
  Replies (11) Good night (4181) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.

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  (832): We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page. http://tfl.nu/lhck
  Replies (12) Good night (4376) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.

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  (631): I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again. http://tfl.nu/8i97
  Replies (4) Good night (1792) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come

  (804): View more from Virginia

  and you stopped teaching...why?

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  (724): You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come (804): and you stopped teaching...why? http://tfl.nu/8fjo
  Replies (5) Good night (2087) Bad night (671)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina

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  (360): 5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina http://tfl.nu/2med
  Replies (16) Good night (1905) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.

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  (704): And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control. http://tfl.nu/cnqj
  Replies (18) Good night (2285) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts

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  (256): 2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts http://tfl.nu/zqnp
  Replies (8) Good night (1261) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot

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  (228): I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot http://tfl.nu/chtf
  Replies (1) Good night (936) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?

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  (706): It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from? http://tfl.nu/d0ez
  Replies (7) Good night (1168) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.

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  (570): If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit. (1-570): As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/hlm9
  Replies (4) Good night (1180) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.

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  (503): Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY. http://tfl.nu/gw0u
  Replies (3) Good night (554) Bad night (214)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"

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  (306): you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!" http://tfl.nu/t9vt
  Replies (1) Good night (647) Bad night (516)

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