dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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