How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
