My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
