He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize