I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
