they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Randomize
