Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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