She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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