he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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