yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
