i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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