The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
