Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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