Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Drunk is not a location!
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