After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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