I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
