next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
