whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.