OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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