Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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