Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
