Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp

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  (212): brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp http://tfl.nu/bier
  Replies (41) Good night (1732) Bad night (12716)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors

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  (513): I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors http://tfl.nu/2p2o
  Replies (25) Good night (2771) Bad night (807)
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  (831): View more from California

  you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger

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  (831): you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger http://tfl.nu/xtvv
  Replies (11) Good night (3730) Bad night (1051)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us

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  (508): well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us http://tfl.nu/w698
  Replies (32) Good night (1004) Bad night (7642)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.

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  (513): You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god. (513): and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon. http://tfl.nu/ae2p
  Replies (21) Good night (5563) Bad night (1115)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?

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  (516): Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me? http://tfl.nu/2ksh
  Replies (63) Good night (6399) Bad night (1536)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk

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  (256): Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk http://tfl.nu/ail4
  Replies (33) Good night (4411) Bad night (1355)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated

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  (517): There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated http://tfl.nu/7pju
  Replies (10) Good night (1436) Bad night (5013)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.

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  (414): I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing. http://tfl.nu/kg0l
  Replies (15) Good night (3029) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.

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  (734): I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door. http://tfl.nu/gl6z
  Replies (7) Good night (2788) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face

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  (682): I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face http://tfl.nu/zwwu
  Replies (16) Good night (5549) Bad night (1215)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...

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  (315): Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night... http://tfl.nu/s4lq
  Replies (5) Good night (642) Bad night (274)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on

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  (905): So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on http://tfl.nu/azx1
  Replies (2) Good night (350) Bad night (1010)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL

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  (202): I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL http://tfl.nu/l7q5
  Replies (9) Good night (529) Bad night (353)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink

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  (307): We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink http://tfl.nu/q4ce
  Replies (0) Good night (645) Bad night (260)

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