Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
