the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Randomize
